UM?

DOES ANYBODY READ THESE? OR AM I BLOGGING FOR MYSELF?

TWO THOUSAND AND NINE

ANOTHER YEAR OVER. THATS ODD. I SWEAR WE JUST CELEBRATED 2008. BUT I CANT SAY I'M SAD TO KNOW THAT THIS YEAR IS OVER. IT HASN'T BEEN A BAD YEAR, BUT I'M HAPPY TO HAVE A NEW START. I'M GLAD TO HAVE MY FIRST YEAR IN LOGAN OVER. SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED. IVE MET SO MANY GREAT PEOPLE, AND SOME NOT SO GREAT PEOPLE. IVE KISSED A FEW BOYS, AND WANTED TO KISS EVEN MORE. IVE MADE FRIENDS AND LOST TOUCH WITH FRIENDS. BUT I THINK I HAVE LEARNED MORE THIS YEAR THAN I HAVE IN ANY OTHER YEAR OF MY LIFE. I FEEL THAT I HAVE GROWN MORE THIS YEAR TOO.
I'M GOING TO BE 21 ON MARCH 5TH. ITS ODD, WHEN I WAS 16 I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD EVER BE 18 AND HERE I AM, ALMOST TWENTY ONE YEARS OLD. DOES THAT SOUND WEIRD TO ANYONE ELSE? PROBABLY NOT.
I'M MOVING, AGAIN. THIS TIME TO NORTH LOGAN INTO A TOWN HOME WITH SOME OF MY FRIENDS. SHOULD BE GOOD. I HAVE MY OWN ROOM AND WONT HAVE TO SHARE MY PERSONAL SPACE. WHICH I THINK IS REALLY GOOD!! I WILL NEVER SHARE A ROOM WITH A GIRL AGAIN!! GROWING UP I HAD MY OWN ROOM AND WHEN I WAS ABOUT 15 I HAD THE WHOLE HOUSE TO MYSELF, SO I'M NOT USED TO HAVING TO SHARE PERSONAL SPACE. NO ONE SHOULD HAVE TO DO THAT. I ALSO THINK THAT KNOWING WHO MY ROOMIES ARE AND HAVING KNOWN THEM FOR A LONG TIME WILL MAKE THINGS EASIER AS WELL... I HOPE.
NEW YEARS EVE IS ON WEDNESDAY. AND I HAVE ZERO PLANS. AND FUNNY ENOUGH, I'M NOT UPSET ABOUT THAT. I'M SURE I WILL KICK IT WITH SOME FRIENDS AND WE WILL HAVE A BLAST BUT THERE ARE NO SET PLANS THIS YEAR.I KINDA LIKE THAT. AND ONCE AGAIN, I WILL NOT BE GETTING A NEW YEARS KISS. I'M 21 AND IVE NEVER BEEN KISSED AT MIDNIGHT ON NEW YEARS. HOW IS IT IVE GONE 21 YEARS WITHOUT ONE? ITS CAUSE I'M BLOND ISNT IT?!
SPEAKING OF BEING BLOND. I JUST RECENTLY DYED MY HAIR AND ITS MUCH MORE BLOND THAT IT WAS BEFORE AND AT WORK WE HAVE THIS CUSTOMER THAT WILL ONLY LET MY HELP HIM. AND HE IS JUST SIMPLY A JERK. HE IS OLD AND HE FEELS LIKE THE WORLD MUST BOW TO HIS EVERY NEED. WHICH WOULD BE FINE IF HE WASN'T A IGNORANT BASTARD. (EXCUSE ME) BUT HE IS. WELL TODAY HE CAME IN AND DID THE USUAL STUFF AND HE LOOKED AT ME WEIRD AND SAID "YOU DYED YOUR HAIR DIDN'T YOU?" AND I SAID "YES I DID, AND YOU DON'T LIKE IT DO YOU?" AND HE SAID "NO I DON'T" AND I SAID "WELL THATS OKAY CAUSE I LIKE IT AND THATS ALL THAT MATTERS!" TO WHICH HE REPLIED "NO THAT DOESN'T MATTER! AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO LOOK PRETTY FOR THE BOYS?" "ARE YOU TELLING ME ITS UGLY?" "I'M SAYING YOU LOOK UGLY WITH THAT HAIR!!"
IT WAS AN INTERESTING CONVERSATION. I CANT SAY ANYONE HAS EVER TOLD ME I LOOKED UGLY BEFORE!! CRIMINY!! YAY MEMORIES!!
I WOULD LIKE TO UPDATE YOU ON ALL THE BOYS IN MY LIFE, BUT ALAS THERE AREN'T ANY. WELL ACTUALLY I'M NOT SURE ABOUT THAT. BUT ITS CONFUSING AND I HAVE NO IDEA IF HE OR HIS FRIENDS READ THIS BLOG SO THATS ALL I'M GOING TO SAY ABOUT IT.
CHRISTMAS WAS A SUCCESS THIS YEAR. EVERY ONE LOVED MY GIFTS AND I LOVED ALL THE GIFTS I GOT. MY PARENTS GOT ME A KNIFE SET AND A CUTTING BOARD AND A TOASTER, AND ELECTRIC BLENDER AND SOME DISH TOWELS. SO I'M ALL SET TO DO ALL SORTS OF COOKING!! BOOYEAH. I GOT SOME MUSIC AND AN AWESOME BEENIE FROM MY SISTERS. BOTH OF THOSE ARE NECESSITIES.

WHELP, THAT PRETTY MUCH CONCLUDES THIS BLOG! TILL NEXT TIME....
LOVE CEEBS

Thanksgiving, Twilight and Christmas... Or Something Like It

I DO BELIEVE I TOLD YOU THAT I WOKE UP WITH SWOLLEN TONSILS LAST WEEK. I WENT TO THE INSTACARE AND GOT TESTED FOR STREP AND MONO, BOTH CAME BACK NEGATIVE, PHEW! OR SO I THOUGHT. I GOT A CALL FROM THEM A FEW DAYS AFTER SAID TESTS AND THEY INFORMED ME THAT I DID IN FACT HAVE STREP. OH HAPPY DAY..... SO AFTER I STARTED TO GET BETTER THEY PUT ME ON ANTIBIOTICS. AFTER I STARTED GETTING BETTER.

THANKSGIVING WAS GOOD THIS YEAR, NOT THAT ITS EVER BAD. THE FAMILY ALL GOT ALONG JUST FINE AND IT WAS GOOD TO SEE MY COUSINS. I DON'T GET TO SEE THEM VERY OFTEN ANY MORE. WE PLAYED AN OLD GAME THAT WE HAVEN'T PLAYED IN A LONG TIME! AND I'M PRETTY SURE THAT WE GOT EVERYONE TO PLAY! EVEN MY GRANDMA! IT WAS SUPER FUN! AFTER EATING OURSELVES ALMOST TO OUR GRAVES WE WENT TO GO SEE TWILIGHT. NOW I AM A HUGE FAN OF THE TWILIGHT BOOKS! AND YES, I'M IN LOVE WITH EDWARD CULLIN (HOW CAN YOU NOT BE?!) BUT, I WAS DISAPPOINTED IN THE MOVIE. I KNOW THAT THEY ONLY HAVE A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF TIME, BUT THEY HARDLY SKIMMED THE STORY!! AND THERE WERE ONLY 2 KISSES!!!! 2! FOR ANYONE WHO HAS READ THE BOOKS YOU WILL UNDERSTAND THAT THAT DOESN'T EVEN COME CLOSE TO THE BOOK! I THINK AS FAR AS CASTING WENT THEY DID A PRETTY GOOD JOB. EVERY ONE LOOKED LIKE I THOUGHT THEY WOULD, BUT THE ACTING WAS NOT SUPERB. EDWARDS ACTING GOT BETTER AS THE MOVIE WENT, BUT ALL IN ALL I FELT THAT HE WAS MUCH MUCH TOO AWKWARD. EDWARD CULLIN IS THE EPITOME OF SMOOTH AND CONFIDENCE! I THINK THEY DID OKAY WITH BELLA, I CANT COMPLAIN TO MUCH ABOUT HER. BUT I THINK THAT THEY COULD HAVE DONE BETTER AT CHOOSING WHICH PARTS THEY PUT IN THE MOVIE. I GUESS THAT I LIKE THE MOVIE, BUT I COULD NEVER LOVE IT. WHICH IS KINDA WHAT I EXPECTED ANYWAY.
I DECIDED TO PUT UP THE CHRISTMAS TREE AND GET THAT ALL DONE WITH. I HAD THE TIME AND SOME FRIENDS WHO WANTED TO HELP ME! WELL MY TREE IS IN THE STORAGE UNIT OF MY OLD APARTMENT, SO I DON'T HAVE A KEY. WELL NOW, WHEN I LIVED THERE WE NEVER LOCKED OUR DOOR (WHICH WOULD BE STUPID, EXCEPT I LIVE IN LOGAN UTAH.) AND AS FAR AS I KNOW ITS USUALLY UNLOCKED. BUT OF COURSE THE ONE TIME I NEED IN TO GET THE KEY, ITS LOCKED!!! SO I HAD TO WAIT FOR A WHILE BEFORE WE COULD GET MY TREE OUT. AND WHEN WE FINALLY DID GET MY TREE, I ALSO FOUND A BUNCH OF OTHER STUFF THAT WAS MINE THAT I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR FOR AGES!! I FOUND TWO SHIRTS I HAD BEEN MISSING AND A PAIR OF PANTS SOME HOODIES AND A BLANKET! GOODNESS! IT WAS BETTER THAN CHRISTMAS!!
SO ME, KYLEIGH, MICHELLE, DEVIN L AND DEVIN S AND AARON ALL PUT UP THE CHRISTMAS TREE AND HELPED DECORATE THE FRONT ROOM OF MY APARTMENT! WE STRUNG FROOT LOOPS ON STRING AND PUT IT ON THE TREE!! I CANT REMEMBER THE LAST TIME I DID THAT!! IT LOOKS SO NEAT! MY TREE ONLY STANDS ABOUT 4 FEET TALL, BUT THAT IS JUST THE RIGHT SIZE FOR AN APARTMENT! IT WAS REALLY FUN TO SPEND TIME WITH SOME FRIENDS. I MADE DINNER FOR EVERYONE AND WE ALSO HAD CANDY CANE HOT CHOCOLATE AND OF COURSE WE ATE ALOT OF FROOT LOOPS! IT WAS A GOOD KICK OFF TO THE CHRISTMAS HOLIDAYS!!
I HOPE THAT THIS WILL BE A GOOD CHRISTMAS! IT HASN'T SNOWED YET, AND I'M KINDA GETTING SICK OF THE COLD WITHOUT THE SNOW! IT JUST SEEMS POINTLESS FOR IT TO BE SO COLD WITH NO SNOW! BUT OF COURSE IN LIKE 2 MONTHS I WILL BE SAYING THAT I HATE THE SNOW AND I WISH THAT SUMMER WOULD COME AGAIN! BUT THAT IS A LONG LONG WAYS AWAY!! LAST WINTER I GOT THE WORST CASE OF THE WINTER BLUES I HAVE EVER HAD! I USUALLY LOVE THE SNOW! BUT IT SEEMED TO GO ON FOREVER LAST YEAR! I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER FEEL WARM AGAIN! BUT OF COURSE SUMMER CAME, SO IT WAS ALL GOOD.
LIFE HAS BEEN FAIRLY INTERESTING AS OF LATE. BUT I'M NOT GOING TO GO INTO DETAIL CAUSE I'M NOT SURE WHO READS THESE. AND SOME THINGS JUST NEED TO BE KEPT ON THE DL. BUT LETS JUST SAY THAT BOYS HAVE BEEN KEEPING LIFE INTERESTING FOR THE LAST COUPLE WEEKS OR SO!
WELL THAT PRETTY MUCH DOES IT FOR THIS BLOG!

JUST A QUICK UPDATE

SO APPARENTLY I HAVE BEEN INTO PICTURES AS OF LATE. BUT I JUST THINK THAT PICTURES DO A BETTER JOB THAN I DO AT TELLING A STORY. I AM ONE OF THOSE PHOTO HAPPY PEOPLE, I HAVE HUNDREDS OF PICTURES FROM THE LAST YEAR, I'M NOT KIDDING. HUNDREDS. JUST ASK PAUL. UNTIL HE TALKED ME INTO PUTTING MY PHOTOS ON A CD, I HAD CLOSE TO 500 PICTURES ON MY CAMERA. BUT THIS IS NOT THE POINT OF THIS BLOG. YOU PROLLY DON'T EVEN CARE HOW MANY PICTURES ARE ON MY CAMERA.

(KYLEIGH, HILARY,ME)

SO I GOT MY ROOTS DYED YESTERDAY, AND I MUST SAY I FEEL MUCH BETTER ABOUT LIFE NOW. I WAS OUT IN SALT LAKE YESTERDAY AND IT WAS GOOD TO GET AWAY FROM LOGAN FOR A LITTLE BIT. NOT THAT I DON'T LIKE LOGAN, IN FACT I LOVE LOGAN!! BUT ITS ALWAYS NICE TO CHANGE THINGS UP A BIT. I SPENT THE WHOLE DAY WITH MY MOM AND ALSO GOT TO SEE MY GRANDPARENTS.

(MANDY, CHELSEA, ME, CELEBRATING MOM'S BDAY)

I HAD A FANTASTIC CONVERSATION WITH KYLIEGH LAST NIGHT AND I GOT TO SEE TYE AND MICHELLE. ITS ALWAYS GOOD TO SEE FRIENDS YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IN AWHILE. I DON'T THINK I HAD SEEN TYE IN ALMOST THREE WEEKS. WHICH IS NO BEUNO CAUSE HE LIVES LESS THEN 2 MINUTES AWAY FROM ME. I GUESS WE BOTH JUST GOT BUSY.

(ME, FATHER, MOTHER, MANDY)

THANKS GIVING IS NEXT WEEK. MANDY ISN'T COMING HOME, SHE SHALL BE MISSED. BUT I THINK EVERYONE ELSE IS GOING TO BE THERE. WE ARE EATING AT MY AUNT LORI'S HOUSE THIS YEAR AND THEN AFTER WE ARE GOING TO SEE TWILIGHT (BOOYEAH!) SO I THINK IT WILL BE A GOOD THANKSGIVING!

(CLEOPATRA, BETTY RUBLE, WILLMA FLINSTONE

AND MINNIE MOUSE)

I WOKE UP THIS MORNING SICK. MY TONSILS ARE SWOLLEN AND IT HURTS TO SWALLOW. I GUESS THATS WHAT I GET FOR NOT GOING TO BED AT A DESCENT TIME FOR THE LAST FOUR NIGHTS. ALL WELL, I HAD FUN SO.......

(ME AND MICHELLE)

WELL HERE ARE SOME PICTURES FROM THE LAST FEW WEEKS. I WILL TRY TO KEEP IT TO JUST A FEW.

HILARY (TOP) MICHELLE (MIDDLE) KYLEIGH (BOTTOM)

AND THAT CONCLUDES OUR BLOG FOR TODAY!! YAY!! LOVE YOU ALL!!

YOU'LL ALWAYS BE MY BEST FRIEND

I wish I knew you Way back when Before you were part of my plans
I think that we would have been friends

There's only time to live our lives
And you'll be the one who's by my side
And I can promise you then
You'll always be my best friend

Till the end when we part I will give you my heart And I'll promise to love you with all that it is And I'll promise to be there whenever you need me Because you'll always be my best friend

You'll always be my best friend

- Relient K

I got friends all over this country

I got friends in other countries too

I got friends I haven't met yet I got friends I never knew

I got lovers whose eyes I've only seen at a glance

I got strangers for great grandchildren

I got strangers for ancestors- Ani Difranco



My foot to the floor I will drive to the placeWhere I can kick it with friends through the night A place we'll talk about now and the past what the future holds Hanging out with not much to do Just aimless with each other - is what we do

Cause this ain’t where it’s at My friends will second that And I gotta admit sometimes it’s pretty sad But it's like were our own brat pack We're always kickin back nobody can take that And that is that it’s like its all we have - The Rocket Summer

NEXT WINDOW PLEASE

IF YOUR DAILY LIFE SEEMS POOR, DO NOT BLAME IT; BLAME YOURSELF THAT YOU ARE NOT POET ENOUGH TO CALL FORTH ITS RICHES; FOR THE CREATOR, THERE IS NO POVERTY.

- RAINER MARIA RILKE


DON'T CRY BECAUSE ITS OVER, SMILE BECAUSE IT HAPPENED

-DR. SUESS


IF YOU WOULD NOT BE FORGOTTEN AS SOON AS YOU ARE DEAD; EITHER WRITE THINGS WORTH READING OR DO THINGS WORTH WRITING

-JULES DE GALTIER

FOR ONE HUMAN BEING TO LOVE ANOTHER: THAT IS THE MOST DIFFICULT OF ALL OUR TASKS, THE ULTIMATE, THE LAST TEST OF PROOF, THE WORK WHICH ALL OTHER WORK IS BUT PREPARATION

- RAINER MARIA RILKE

BE WHO YOU ARE AND SAY WHAT YOU FEEL BECAUSE THOSE WHO MIND, DON'T MATTER AND THOSE WHO MATTER DON'T MIND

-DR. SUESS

HOLDING ON TO ANGER IS LIKE GRASPING A HOT COAL WITH THE INTENT OF THROWING AT SOMEONE ELSE; YOU ARE THE ONE WHO GETS BURNED.

- BUDDHA

INTELLIGENCE WITHOUT AMBITION IS A BIRD WITHOUT WINGS

- SALVADOR DALI


As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You'll have your heart broken and you'll break others' hearts. You'll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you'll cry because time is flying by. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you've never been hurt. Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. you just have to live life to the fullest, tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone's hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts. Don't be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back.

- UNKNOWN

BIRTHDAYS, HALLOWEEN AND STUFF

as you know we celebrated my mom's birthday a few weeks ago. mandy flew back in from colorado and chels came up from salt lake and i came down from logan land! we took her out to eat at bucca di bebo and we ate ourselves silly!! we had pizza and garlic bread and caprize and chicken and pasta and of course we had dessert!! i havent eaten that much in one sitting in a long long time!!! it was so good!! after dinner the sisters hopped in one car and our parents hopped in another and we all met down town at the clark planitarium. call me a geek or a nerd or whatever, but i freakin love the clark planitarium!! its just so much fun! we bought our tickets for the "rock on demand" lazer light show and then hung around the planitarium untill the show started. there was, of course, lots to see. i gave a fake weather report and was on tv and everything! it was rather magical. we read about the planets and what they are made of and all that jazz. then we discovered that there were places set up to look like the moon and mars. needless to say we went a little photo happy and crazy!! it was great fun!! our show was great! it included songs like "sandman" and "tom saywer" and of course "another brick in the wall" among others!! if you ever get a chance to see a lazer light show, do it. and that pretty much sums up mom's 50th birthday bash!
so i guess that brings us up to halloween, one of my favorite hollidays!!! my friends and i decided to go to the howl! so after i finaly found the perfect shoes for my costume michelle and i went to get ready at my apartment and of course we hit a road block! i couldnt find the leggings that i needed for my costume!! oh no its the end of the world!!! but i eventually just decided on wearing my black knee length running pants. so after we avoided that disaster we got into our costumes and did our make up and headed on over to kyleigh and hilary's place! oh, i guess i should mention what mine and michelle's costumes were. i was cleopatra (only with blond hair) and michelle was minie mouse! so there was alot going on over at ky and hil's! of course there was five girls getting ready to go to a halloween party!! needless to say we had planned on leaving around 830ish maybe 845, and we left for the howl at 10! there were hords of people at the howl! ive never see so many fat girls in tight clothes in one place in my life!!! it was rediculous!! but, on the other hand there were some pretty cool costumes! there was one kid dressed up as edward sicssor hands! his costume was AWESOME!! there were a few bands that played, one of them being "love you long time" michelle and i went to see them and it was pretty awesome!! the only bad thing was that they had them play in a small room and everyone was dancing and jumping around and it got really really really hot in there! but it was so worth it!! they are so good live!!! shell and i then met back up with kyleigh and hilary and rikelle and we danced our little hearts out untill "recyled percussion" took the stage! i had never heard of them before that night. they make their music using things like chain saws on metal and ladders and garbage cans and stuff like that! it was so neat! when they played on the latters they would climb up them and then jump of and stuff like that! it was pretty radtastic! they were fun to watch! after all that dancing and partying we were pretty wiped and hungry, we stoped off at mcdonalds on the way home and got some food and i fell asleep pretty fast after we ate. all in all it was a good halloween!
and on with the "stuff" section of this blog. im afraid to say that the little baby i blogged about last didnt pull through. there was nothing the doctors could do for him and they pulled him off life support wednessday evening around six. there will be a service this saturday, and of course i have to work, so i wont be able to attend. i wish i could.
on a happier note! i have recently made friends with the boys next door! yay!! i love new friends! well i guess not all of them are new friends! my old neighbor, aaron, is still my neighbor. so i guess that doesnt make him my old neighbor, just my neighbor. anyway. back to the point. i have made new friends with trent mckay and jacob! they are pretty nice guys! its good to have nice neighbors. for the record a couple of my roomies are driving me up the wall!! and i dont really want to take the time to explaine it all. plus you will prolly find it boring to read. well thats pretty much all that is going on with my life, thanksgiving is coming up, but whatev. i could take it or leave it. well i guess i will catch ya next time!

I DONT KNOW WHAT TO CALL THIS ONE

two weeks ago my boss, ted, had his first grandchild. a little girl named elizabeth. the whole preganancy went well and the baby was born heathy. all is looking well for little elizabeth. but just this last weekend, my other boss, sandy recived her first grandchild. a little boy name kaden. but unfortunatly things are'nt looking good for kaden. while he was only born about two weeks early, he has a hole in his lung and his hip is dislocated. then we found out that he is missing a kidney and the kidney that he does have isnt functioning right and has sists on it. and on top of all this he has a hole in his heart and has no bladder. i cant even express how incredibly sad and upset this makes me. its just not fair. and i know that nothing is fair. but it just seems like somethings are much more unfair. just to prove my point, my co worker cathy, just told us that her daughter is expecting thier first child in may. we have so many emotions going on in my office right now! im not sure i can handle all of this!! my heart is breaking for sandy and her daughter, but im so happy for ted and cathy!! things like this make me not want to have kids. i mean i really really do want to have kids, but i think that i would be completly heartbroken if i lost a child. im not sure i could deal with it. but then i have to realize that there are so many heathly babies that have never had any problems! and its not worth it to live in any kind of fear. once again, you just have to have faith that god knows what he is doing.

TELL ME IF THIS SOUNDS KINDA WEIRD TO YOU

okay, so about... oh almost a year ago. i was kinda dating this kid. he was my friends neighbor, and everything just kinda happened. it was weird. one day i had hardly even talked to this kid and then i have one conversation with him and like 2 days later we made out. anyway, he and i dated for maybe a month....maybe a little less. well he tells me (what i believe to be) a cock and bull story and breaks up with me. he told me he didnt want a relationship right now and that he wanted to be my friend but that we couldnt date any more. blah blah blah. well about a week later he calls me and says he needs to talk to me. so i go over and he proceeds to tell me "ive met someone" and that they were then dating. (cock and bull) so im kinda mad, and hurt and fairly upset and i decied that i want nothing to do with him any more. so i stop answering his phone calls and his texts and his myspace comments and messages. and finaly he emails me and says that he thinks i hate him. so i pretty much tell him off. and of course told him to leave me alone. but does he? oh no! of course not, that would only make my life easier!! so i continue to ignore him hoping that he will get the picture eventually. now durring this time i had started to date my friend paul, and im glad to say that paul was the best support ever!! so one night paul and i are watching a movie with my roomies and i get a call from my dear friend kyleigh. "hello?" "hey, so i just got an email from _-_-" he honestly emailed my friend!!!! he was upset and didnt know what to do cau2se i wouldnt talk to him. and he said that i was the best friend he had ever had and blah blah blah!! and he wanted things to just go back to how they were when he and i were just friends. news flash, he and i were "just friends" for like 2 days!!!! so ky and paul wrote him an email together and told him he needed to leave me alone!! and guess what? he finaly did!! yay!! well anyway, he and the girl he started seeing after me got married a week ago. and the other day i got a text from him!!! yes, my MARIED ex text me a week after he got married!!!! well i got curious as to what the heck he would have to say to me, so i text him back. and he just wanted to know what was up and how i was doind and if i had halloween plans, and then he has the guts to ask about paul!! for those of you who already know this story that will make sense to you as to why that is such a big deal. so i found it a little wierd that he would be texting me and talking to me right after he got married. shouldnt he be spending time with his WIFE? it may have been different if we had all be really good friends before they got married or something, but even then...... i just found it extreamly interesting. so i thought i would share the story with you all!! yay stories!! anyway thats the end amen!
new subject.....
my family and i are celebrating my mother's 50th birthday tonight! the whole family! mandy is flying in from CO and chels will be there!! its always kinda exciting when my whole family gets together! its not a regular thing for us to all be together!! but this will be twice this month!! it should be fun!!!

A SHOUT OUT TO ALL I MISS

some days i just miss everyone. i miss everyone back in salt lake and i miss people here in Logan that i don't see all the time. i miss my family, mom, dad, Chelsea and Mandy. i talk to them all on a fairly regular basis, but ya know. nothing beats time together!! i miss friends from high school, Todd, Nick w, Nick b, Aaron, Natalie, Shaun, Shelby, Missy, and so many others. i miss my friends back home, Chelsee, Amanda, Kade, Kameron and i miss people from Logan, Paul, Ben, Ryan and Shannon, Devin, Neal, Steve, Darren. and I'm sure i have missed someone, but if you are reading this and your not on my list. that doesn't mean i don't love you and miss you!!! it just means my brain isn't working right now. so call me!!! i miss everyone from my old dance company! i miss Lori, and Maggie and Mrs. Jamie. i just want every one to know i haven't forgotten them, and that i love and miss them dearly!!!

LIVING WITHIN YOUR MEANS

IT NEVER FAILS TO AMAZE ME HOW PEOPLE CANT SEEM TO LIVE WITHIN THEIR MEANS!! PEOPLE! ITS NOT THAT HARD. HERE IS A LITTLE ADVICE FROM ME TO YOU. DON'T SPEND MORE THAN YOU MAKE. IS THAT REALLY ALL THAT HARD? I DON'T THINK IT IS!!! OF COURSE I DON'T HAVE SCADS OF MONEY TO JUST SPEND. AND SO THE TEMPTATION REALLY ISN'T THAT MUCH TO ME. (THANK GOODNESS) BUT SEEMS LIKE THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE THE MOST MONEY ALSO TEND TO BE THE ONES WHO SPEND MORE THAN THEY MAKE. THEY BUY CARS THAT COST WAY TO MUCH A MONTH AND THEY FINANCE HOUSES THAT THEY CANT PAY ON EVERY MONTH AND THEY BUY TOYS! BOATS, CARS, MOTORCYCLES, FOUR WHEELERS, TRUCKS, JET SKIS. AND THEN THEY START GOING ON VACATIONS THEY CANT AFFORD!! GA!! IT NEVER ENDS!!! ITS RIDICULOUS SERIOUSLY!! AND PEOPLE WONDER WHY OUR ECONOMY SUCKS!! LOOK AROUND!!!PEOPLE HAVE THEIR HEADS SO FAR UP THEIR ASSES THAT THEY DON'T EVEN REALIZE THAT DEBT IS A VERY VERY BAD THING!! (UNNECESSARY DEBT THAT IS, YA KNOW, YOU HAVE TO HAVE A HOUSE AND YOU HAVE TO HAVE AT LEAST ONE CAR. BUT THATS ITS!!! OH AND SCHOOL!! SCHOOL IS VERY IMPORTANT.)
WHILE WE ARE ON A VENTING FEST HERE....
I JUST LOVE PEOPLE WHO THINK THEIR LIVES ARE SO HARD AND YET, THEIR PARENTS PAY FOR THEIR HOUSING, SCHOOLING, BOOKS, FOOD, UTILITIES. THESE KIDS DON'T EVEN WORK!!!THAT DRIVES ME UP THE WALL!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!! IVE BEEN WORKING SENSE I WAS 16, AND WHEN I STARTED WORKING MY PARENTS STARTED CUTTING ME OFF!! NOW GRANTED I AM THE YOUNGEST OF THREE GIRLS SO I THINK I HAD IT A BIT EASIER THAN MY SISTERS. BUT I STILL HAD TO WORK, I BOUGHT MY OWN CAR, I MAKE THE MONTHLY PAYMENTS. I FOUND MY APARTMENT, I MAKE MONTHLY PAYMENTS. I HAVE A PHONE, I HAVE UTILITIES I HAVE TO BUY MY OWN FOOD AND CLOTHS AND GAS AND EVERYTHING ELSE!! IF I BORROW MONEY FROM MY PARENTS, I HAVE TO PAY THEM BACK. THEY DON'T JUST HAND OUT MONEY TO ME ANY MORE!!! COME ON KIDS!! GET YOUR BUTT IN GEAR AND GET A JOB! NO MORE FREE LOADING!! YOU NEED TO BECOME A CONTRIBUTING PART OF THE SOCIETY!! PLEASE!!! BUT YA KNOW, THATS JUST MY OPINION, TAKE IT FOR WHAT ITS WORTH. WHATEV.

THRILLER

Halloween, by far my favorite Holiday. you all can keep your thanksgiving and Christmas!! ill take Halloween any day! the change of seasons, the colors!! the candy!! whats not to love?! except for maybe the crazy people who sacrifice animals on Halloween, i don't really love that so much. i love walking out my door in the mornings and smelling the crisp Autumn air!! and of course my absolute favorite part? sweaters and boots and hoodies!!! i like to get all snuggled up before i go outside! i think the reason i love this Holiday so much is it reminds me of being a kid. i would start thinking about my Halloween costume in like august! i always knew what i wanted to be! things like vampires, or a mummy when i was really little i went as belle from beauty and the beast! i loved that costume! i was a mad scientist one year! we ratted my hair and sprayed it white, it was pretty awesome! last year my friend and i went as a cat and mouse, i was the cat. and the year before that i went as an emo kid!! (non conforming as can be) and this year i shall be Cleopatra, or maybe a flapper girl. its a tie between the two. don't worry, i will let you know what i decide on ;)
well last night me and my friends Michelle and kyleigh went to see thriller up on campus! it was dang good!! the dancing was fantastic!!! and all the funny parts were...well... funny. (go figure) my favorite funny/creepy dance was with the three jasons. they do a sorta stomp dance (no music, they make the beats with their hands and feet etc.) and they started out with small knives and then they pulled out machetes and eventually the chain saws! but there was one who would get distracted and the others would have to kinda beat up on him to get him to do the right steps again. and at one point he brought out a teddy bear and was hugging it and gave it a little Jason mask! it was pretty funny!! but my favorite dance was the mummy and Egyptian dance!! it started out with some belly dancing girls and then the mummies wake up and it turns into a hip hop dance. pretty awesome!! i would say if you have the opportunity to see "thriller" do it! it is worth your time.

CHANGE

its amazing to me how fast things can change. one second your happy, and the next... everything seems to have been torn away from you. and yet, life continues on, no matter how badly you want it to stop and wait for you to be okay again. but eventually things do start to be okay again. and your able to move on and hope that something else will come along. something that is just as great, maybe even better than what you had. even if that doesnt seem possible. with change you seem to apreciate what you have more. it throws things into perspective. you find out who your real friends are, and those who just dont seem to care as much. and your happy to find out that the friend who has been with you the longest is a true friend, as she has proven over and over again. and your realize, that maybe my life isnt so bad. you have good friends, a loving family, a good job, good health, faith and that all leads to hope. hope that something or someone will find you that will make your life feel complete yet again. the hardest part is letting go, and trying to dive into a new situation. a situation that you hope will lead to new and exciting experiances and friends. but once you let go and you take that dive, things seem to get better. slowly, they do get better. and you start to understand things better. that maybe this all happened for you to learn something. and that makes you look at the situation in a much better light. maybe you werent as ready as you thought you were. or maybe the timing wasnt quite right. whatever the reason, you know that god knows what he is doing that he will never lead you in the wrong direction. you just have to have faith that he loves you and wants to see you happy. and suddenly after all that... well life seems pretty damn good. and that is all that matters in the end.

its a wonderful beautiful amazing life

so i pretty much think i suck at this whole blogging thing, my last blog was in febuary and here we are halfway through summer!! sheesh! alot has changed!! (enter paul) okay let me give you some backround on paul dattage. my old roommate, kelsey, broke up with her boyfriend, got a job at a kiosk in the mall and as a result met paul. i guess he and some friends came up and talked to her and they exchanged numbers. so all i hear from kelsey is "paul this" and "paul that" but i never met the kid. untill one day as im bounding down my stairs to go to work, there is kels and some kid cuddling on the couch, well kelsey is out cold, but paul is awake. (side note, paul had recently been in a church ball accident and had laserations on his face as well as a big ol beard) so i come bounding down my stairs and see this "cave man" sitting on my couch with my roommate and all i can muster up is "hey" to which he replies "hey" and then i was out the door and on my way. and that is how i met paul. of course he was around alot more after that and i came to learn that he was a pretty cool kid. well push come to shove and kelsey dumped him and got back together with her old boyfriend (i love you kels, but you gave up a dang good thing, not that im complaining mind you) and so paul of course stops coming around. well i had been seeing a boy fairly exclusively while paul was around, but he and i stoped seeing eachother and i was single once again! well time passed and i started thinking to myself "self, that paul kid was pretty cool, you should be his friend" so i asked kelsey for his number and i text him and we started hanging out a little, and then we started hanging out a bit more and then we started hanging out every day! and i was having the time of my life!! and little by little i started to care for this kid. but we kept talking about how we were just friends. but the more i hung out with him the more and more i liked him, and being around him and talking to him. well things just kinda snowballed, and we ended up confessing to eachother one night, that we liked eachother. that night he kissed me. and thus started the best relationship i have ever been in!! its been two months, and its been the best two months of my life. i couldnt ask for a better friend, or boyfriend. he is simply amazing. and i dont think paul could have come into my life at a better time. kyleigh and hilary moved away right as paul and i started to become really good friends. and i dont know what i would do with myself if it werent for paul. now dont ge me wrong, i have some great roommates and some great friends from crestview and i hang out with them too, but we usually do pretty mellow stuff. we sit on the porch and read alot. and we have so much fun, its kinda funny cause some days no one will talk, and other days we cant shut up. and our books end up under our chairs, forgotton. but paul and i, we go and do stuff. we go and see movies, or we go to the park with a big group of people and play night games, or play frizbee. so i have just as much fun with my roommates and friends, its just different with paul. well, duh, of course it is, he is my boyfriend.
so i guess all that has really changed is my moving and paul and i starting a relationship. but i feel like my life has changed, i cant really explaine it. it just feels totally different. its a good different. but there are times when i really really miss the old days and my old friends, but then i start to think about the new days and the new friends, and i dont think i would change that for the world. it truly is a wonderful beautiful amazing life.

EVERY FIGHT IS A FOOD FIGHT WHEN YOUR A CANNIBAL

SAY HELLO TO SUNSHINE

SO, AS PROMISED HERE I AM TO BLOG MORE ABOUT THE LAST FEW WEEKS! WELL FOR STARTERS I WOULD JUST LIKE TO SAY SOME PEOPLE ARE CRAZY!!!! I DANCE WITH A COMPANY BY THE NAME OF VALLEY DANCE ENSEMBLE, AND WE ARE A MODERN DANCE COMPANY AND WE DO SHOWS EVERY SPRING UP IN LOGAN. WELL ANYWAY WE ARE GETTING READY TO START PRACTICING AND LEARNING THE DANCES WE WILL PERFORM AND ONE OF THE DIRECTORS OF THE COMPANY HAD THIS GREAT IDEA, SHE WANTS TO FILM A DANCE ON LOCATION!! SOUNDS COOL HUH? WELL HERE IS THE CATCH... ON LOCATION MEANS THIS WEEKEND IN OGDEN IN HER BACK YARD, WHICH IS PRETTY MUCH THE MOUNTAINS!! SHE WANTS TO FILM A DANCE IN THE EFFING SNOW!! IN THE EFFING MOUNTAINS!!!!ITS GOING TO BE SO STINKING COLD!! BUT I MEAN IT COULD BE REALLY COOL AND INTERESTING! SO I'M HOPING IT TURNS OUT OKAY. I WILL LET YOU KNOW. MAYBE I WILL TAKE MY CAMERA AND POST PICTURES LATER!!
OKAY! NOW HERE IS THE REAL EXCITING NEWS! FINCH CONCERT! MONDAY JANUARY 21, 2008!! ME AND MY FRIEND DARREN WENT AND IT WAS AWESOME!! NO, IT WAS INCREDIBLE!! I WILL JUST SAY ONE OF THE BEST CONCERTS IVE BEEN TO! BUT LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THE WHOLE TRIP. SO DARREN AND I HEAD HOME TO SANDY UTAH TO STAY WITH MY PARENTS FOR THE WEEKEND. NOW, BUT A MINOR NOTE, DARREN IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND! HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND (NOT ME) SO ANYWAY WE HEAD HOME SATURDAY AND HE MEETS MY FAMILY AND ALL IS FINE AND DANDY. WE HANG OUT WITH SOME FRIENDS AND EAT SOME CHEESE FRIES AND GRAB A COFFEE. AND THEN SUNDAY COMES. AND OF COURSE WE GO TO CHURCH WITH MY PARENTS, SO WE ARE SITTING AND I START TO NOTICE PEOPLE TURNING TO LOOK SO I LEAN OVER TO DARREN AND I SAY "YOU ARE AWARE OF WHAT PEOPLE ARE ASSUMING RIGHT?" AND HE LAUGHS AND REPLIES "YEAH I SURE DO" SO ALL DAY LONG I HAD TO EXPLAIN THAT "NO HE ISN'T MY BOYFRIEND/I'M NOT GETTING MARRIED, WE ARE JUST FRIENDS HERE FOR A CONCERT ON MONDAY." THERE WERE A LOT OF DISAPPOINTED WOMEN IN THE CONGREGATION. ALL WELL. AFTER CHURCH WE EAT DINNER WITH MY PARENTS (PORK CHOPS MM MM)AND WATCHED SOME FOOTBALL WITH THE DADDIO. NOW EVERY SUNDAY MY WHOLE EXTENDED FAMILY GETS TOGETHER AND WE EAT FOOD AND TALK ABOUT THE SAME STUFF EVERY WEEK. NOW NORMALLY I WOULD NOT HAVE TAKEN A FRIEND TO SUCH AN EVENT BUT MY COUSIN IS PREGNANT AND I MISSED HER SHOWER SO I NEEDED TO TAKE HER GIFT TO HER. SO I INTRODUCE DARREN AS "MY FRIEND DARREN." AND WE GO ABOUT OUT MERRY WAY. WE START TO EAT SOME HOME MADE PIZZA BITS AND MY COUSIN JON COMES UP AND SAYS "SO, WHO IS YOUR BOYFRIEND?" HA!! I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY. WE WENT ALONG WITH IT AND SAID WE WERE PLANNING TO ELOPE! IT WAS SILLY. BUT NOW I'M JUST RAMBLING ABOUT NOTHING. THE CONCERT IS WHAT WE ARE HERE TO TALK ABOUT!!! WELL DAR AND I ARIVED TO THE AVALON ABOUT 45 MINUTES BEFORE THE CONCERT AND WE STOOD OUTSIDE UNTILL THEY OPENED THE DOORS AND GOODNESS WAS IT COLD!! WE DIDN'T WEAR OUR COATS CAUSE WE EXPECTED IT TO BE WARM INSIDE WHAT WITH THE MOSHING AND WHAT NOT. SO FINALLY THE DOORS OPEN AND WE GO INSIDE AND IT WAS FREEZING!!!! THEY DIDN'T THINK IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO HEAT THE INSIDE!! IT WAS SO COLD! SO WE WATCHED MURY PLAY, AND I MUST SAY I WAS IMPRESSED THEY WERE WAY GOOD AND FUN TO WATCH. AND THEN SOUND THE ALARM GOT UP AND THAT WAS AMAZING!! THEY ARE SO GOOD LIVE! NOT TO MENTION THEY WERE ALL OVER THE STAGE!! IT WAS GREAT! THEN THERE WAS THIS ONE BAND I CANT MEMBER THEIR NAME, BUT THEY WERE TALENTED AS INDIVIDUALS BUT THEY COULDN'T PULL IT TOGETHER TO MAKE A GOOD SONG. IT WAS JUST A BUNCH OF NOISE!! NOT GOOD. AND THEN FINCH TOOK THE STAGE!! AND THEY BLEW ME AWAY!! IT WAS FAAAANTASTIC!! WE WERE SO CLOSE TO THE STAGE THAT WE COULD TOUCH NATE (LEAD VOCALS) AND R2K (GUITAR) EASILY!! AFTER THE SHOW WE MET NATE AND R2K IT WAS AWESOME I BOUGHT MY SHIRT FROM R2K AND DARREN AND I BOTH GOT PICTURES WITH HIM!! WE HAD WAY TO MUCH FUN! IN FACT SO MUCH FUN THAT GOD THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO THROW SOME UNFUNNESS AT US. WHEN WE GOT TO MY CAR IT HAD BEEN BOOTED AND THEY WOULD ONLY TAKE IT OFF IF WE PAID 80 BUCKS IN CASH, NO CHECKS OR SEXUAL FAVORS!! LAME. SO WE HAD JUST SPENT ALL OUR MONEY ON FINCH AND SOUD THE ALARM MERCH AND ALL WE HAD WAS LIKE 30 BUCKS BETWEEN THE BOTH OF US. SO DARREN TAKES OFF AT A DEAD SPRINT FOR THE NEAREST ATM (3 BLOCKS AWAY)AND I WAIT, AND JUST AS THE TOW TRUCK PULLS UP DARREN COMES RUNNING AROUND THE CORNER WITH THE REST OF THE MONEY!! IT WAS KINDA FUNNY BUT ANNOYING ALL AT THE SAME TIME!! WAS QUITE THE NIGHT!! BUT ALL IN ALL IT WAS A GREAT WEEKEND!!!

not much time

work is almost over. thank god.
went to the finch concert on monday. it kicked ass. yep. i will blog more later!